Toronto FC: Weapons of Self Destruction (AKA Fire Mo Johnston NOW!)

This was supposed to be part 2 of my NBA Finals preview. But you know what? Scrap that. I’ve had enough and I’m going to rant on my piece of crap soccer team known as Toronto FC.

I’m done. I’ve been patient enough. It’s been 3 years in existence for Toronto FC, and I’ve been following them since game 1. I, along with thousands of others whom either pay to see them play or watch them on TV and on the internet (the latter would be me),  sat through an 824 minute goalless streak, routine 3-0 and 4-0 losses, fewest goals in MLS history, and everything else you could expect from an expansion team. I’m patient when it comes to that. Just need to dump some players who clearly couldn’t cut it (Cough)Andrea Lombardo(Cough).

Last night, all Toronto FC needed was a win in Burnaby, BC against the Vancouver Whitecaps, a USL side, to clinch the Nutrilite Canadian Champions League and advance to the CONCACAF Champions League. Toronto dominated Vancouver in the reverse fixture in everything but the scoreline. A 1-0 win is still 3 points though. TFC and Vancouver were tied on points last night, but Toronto had a game in hand.

Instead, I’m treated to watching on a small computer monitor, a 2-0 loss by TFC and probably the worst game they’ve ever played. Missed chance after missed chance coupled with uninspiring play means that the only way Toronto can win this is if they beat Montreal 4-0 two weeks from now.

I’ll say it right now, it’s not going to happen.

Three years is long enough to get a competent striker that can bury his chances as opposed to these bozos that couldn’t score in a brothel. Three years is long enough to organize the defense and not have these kamikaze screw-ups every freaking week.

FIRE MO JOHNSTON NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

FIRE MO JOHNSTON NOW!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

Fire general manager Mo Johnston. Don’t even wait until after this weekend’s game against the Los Angeles Galaxy. Your constant “Pick a random washed-up player who used to play in the lower tier of a British football league” ploy failed. Hacks like Laurent Robert, Collin Samuel, Andy Welsh, and Rohan Ricketts FAILED. In three years TFC’s all-time leading goal-scorer, Danny Dichio, has 12 goals. TWELVE!!!!!!! And yet we as fans are treated to a striking corp in year 3 that can say they have put up a grand total of  4 goals in 12 MLS games?

In the past two years, Jeff Cunningham (Mr. Couldn’t Tap the Ball in From Six Inches to Secure a CONCACAF Champions League Spot in 2008), Chad Barrett, Pablo Vitti, and Carlos Ruiz have been your “accomplishments” and “solutions” to this striking mess. They’ve made it worse. Two of them are gone, Vitti and Barrett remain. Barrett couldn’t hit the broad side of a barn and Vitti is quickly becoming like his partner in crime. You have to really suck to bat .000 in getting Toronto FC the striker and proven finisher that is needed to succeed in league and tournament play.

You’ve been given two glorious chances to get into the CONCACAF Champions League by just beating to USL sides that are supposedly inferior. Instead Montreal and Vancouver get to go in their respective years, while the fanbase watches shell-shocked at this garbage team you’ve put out.

Last night’s farce was the ultimate embarrassment. To watch 11 supposed professional footballers play like amateurs in the biggest game in franchise history was cringeworthy. I was seeing red when Vancouver went 2-0 up.

Some of the blame goes to the players. I know you can’t control Kevin Harmse’s disastrous “defending”, nor can you control Chad Barrett firing every shot right to the goalkeeper. That’s the coach’s job (which is another mess I won’t get into). However, you signed, drafted and traded for every one of those guys on the pitch on Tuesday. Instead of hiding behind the curtains doing nothing and remaining silent, get off your high horse, pack your bags, and let someone more competent do your job.

Go back to the UK. I don’t want to end my support for TFC. I want your sorry a** fired. I don’t care if Andy Reid from the Philadelphia Eagles takes over the controls,  no one can be worse than you.

The fans deserve better than this dogcrap “club” under your guidance. These aren’t high expectations to win a three team tournament when you’re in a higher league than the other two. It’s clearly too much to handle for you Mr. Johnston, so leave the club immediately, and take Barrett and Harmse with you.


5 thoughts on “Toronto FC: Weapons of Self Destruction (AKA Fire Mo Johnston NOW!)

  1. James

    Mookie, love your passion.

    You’ve got to be frustrated by their lack of scouting Latin America. Only three players come from Latin American countries: Guevara (Honduras); Velez (P.R.); and Vitti (Argentina). Really, that’s sad. one would think it would be beneficial to scout in that region more than signing players based on reputation.

    Come on over to Sounders FC. Living in the area, I’m sure you’ve got to be considering it. Hell, Sounders FC Alliance members get to vote out the GM after four years if he’s doing a bad job. If TFC had this option for its fans, I’m sure that Johnston would definitely be fired no later than next year.

    By the way, I’ve been reading your blog for awhile. I haven’t posted before so that I could get a feel for your style. Just thought you’d like to know that CTV is shown in Whatcom Co. and Anacortes Comcast cable systems. I’m also able to get CTV over-the-air in HD. Not that it matters though, by the sounds of it CTV’s coverage of the Vancouver Winter Olympics will suck as much as NBC’s coverage will.

    1. Mookie Post author

      Two of those three players from Latin American countries are crap (Velez and Vitti). Guevara right now is probably the MVP of the team so far. Mo just picks based on blind favoritism and it irks me.

      I’ve read a lot about what the Sounders have done. Who knows? Maybe I’ll join. The “vote out the GM because he sucks” idea is just brilliant. Mo would get kicked out so quickly. He’s incompetent at nearly everything he does.

      Thanks for the info on CTV. I’m nowhere near Whatcom or Anacortes County though so that’s unfortunate. Hopefully in 2010 the Mookie household will not deal with Comcast.

      Thanks for the readership and a great comment!

  2. Pingback: HOLY CRAP TORONTO FC ARE CHAMPIONS OF CANADA!!!!!!!!!!!! « Stupid Sideline Reporters

  3. Pingback: Day of Reckoning for Toronto FC « Stupid Sideline Reporters

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