What the Losers Are Saying: Special Washington Redskins Edition

It’s NFL season so look out for this every Tuesday. We won’t go everywhere for every fan’s reaction (usually 5-6 teams are picked) but the deemed “best losers” of the day make the cut. But because of the events that occurred at Ford Field on Sunday, there is no reason to go to any other city (and that includes the still grieving San Francisco) than DC. For this week, and this week only, our sole focus is the new laughing stock of the league, the Washington Redskins. It will be 5-6 variations of in-game quotes, post-game rants, well-reasoned articles, and of course pee your pants humor.


“wow…a team punching the ball in when you need 1yd. you dont see that too often when the redskins are around…”

“I hope Zorn has a good real estate agent. It is going to be tough selling that house in Ashburn in this slow market.”

“So let’s see, Giants are playing the Bucs, up 24-0, and David Carr is in the game. Eagles crushing KC 34-7, Garcia was just in the game. We’re playing the ****ing Lions, and are down in the 4th. Beautiful.”

“Hunter Smith can stay when we blow this team up and clean house.”

“Only the Redskins would let a rookie QB who is down on his confidence and an INT machine completely own them. That’s how we roll. Get healthy against the Redskins.” – A bunch of comments in the game thread from Extreme Skins.

The hilarity doesn’t stop there. Immediate reaction after the clock reached :00, also from Extreme Skins.

Final Seconds

“Throw the #$%&** ball in the endzone!!!

Hook and Ladder?!?!?!? Are you ****ing kidding me? They actually called a timeout, and that’s the best play we could come up with?

Ladell Betts has to be the dumbest player in the world. He may very well have got out of bounds with 0:01 left but as usual he’s allergic to the sideline. What a huge jack@$$.

Betts has to be without a doubt one of the dumbest players I have ever seen. Last week he runs out of bounds to stop the clock when we need it to run, this week he tops that stupidity by staying inbounds when we need to stop the clock, and decides not to lateral the ball when he clearly ought to.

“****! ****! ****! ****! ****!  ****ING Detroit ****ing lions!”

Hindsight is 20-20 but Zorn has to be joking. It’s 4th and 10 and he actually goes for the first down and not the touchdown. Campbell is not noodle-armed and with that little time you throw that crap into the end zone. But since Zorn decided that a hook-and-ladder play made logical sense, it’s on Betts to realize how much time there is left and get out of bounds after the first down, not fall in the middle of the field.

I will put more blame on Zorn than Betts for that final play. It’s a terrible playcall with no timeouts down by 5. GO FOR THE WIN!!!

The Post Mortem

I’m trying to think of a worse loss in all of DC sports history, and I can’t. The Skins not only failed, but they’ve quit. The Washington Examiner wrote this morning that a player said the team had no energy coming back out for the second half. No rah-rah speeches. Nothing. Does this sound like a team with pride? Does this sound like a team that is behind their coach?

Blow it up. The Redskins could get first and second round picks for a lot of their players. Moss, Portis, Landry, Carlos, Samuels…ship em all out. If the Skins can’t win with, why keep them in their prime? The next coach isn’t going to want this sorry excuse for a West Coast Offense. Let someone else come in with a clean slate and a ton of draft picks. – KevinE from Hogs Haven on Monday saying that the Redskins should clean house and start over.

Washington might as well….at the end of the season. But the ‘Skins are hopeless at this point and it may be a blessing in disguise that they lost against the Lions. Then again this is Dan Snyder so he’ll blow this situation just like the numerous screw-ups of the past (Steve Spurrier to name one).

The Post Mortem II

Washington lost to a team: that lost 19 straight games; that started five rookies; whose rookie quarterback; Matthew Stafford; had a QB rating of 40 going into the game; who had the 27th ranked defense Sunday morning; that is being rebuilt by a former Redskin, Martin Mayhew.

More telling than the score was the Lions’ time of possession (36:48) and third-down conversions (10-18).

Washington’s defense was ranked fourth last season. With the addition of Albert Haynesworth and Brian Orakpo, the Defense was supposed to be the strength of the team. They were owned by Detroit. – Anthony Brown of Redskins Hog Heaven with a statistical take on the “Disaster in Detroit”.

Sounds to me like the Lions could’ve won this game by more. But it’s still the Lions.

Last but not least, one of the funniest posts/rants I’ve ever read:


Sonofaf**kingbitch. How do you lose to the Goddamn Lions? One of the more underrated aspects in sport is being able to point to a time during the season in which you saw your team quit. When did I see the team that I love more than almost anything roll over and die? Oh, that’s easy.

That would be when they got stuffed on 4th and goal by the sh**ty ass Lions and then gave up a 99 yard touchdown drive to follow. That was the moment. Right there. The season is officially over. You can’t come back from that.

Jim Zorn needs to be fired this week. Hell, I would have fired him in the locker room after the game. To make it more embarrassing, Snyder should have Tom Cruise sh*t-can this idiot. Sh*t-can him and then have the entire team sh*t on his face. I bet he gets off on that though. He is in way over his head. He has no idea what he is doing. His gameplans are awful (because he doesn’t have them). If you have had the misfortune of watching the Redskins at all this season, you will know that they run only two plays: Portis behind Chris Samuels and an assortment of 3 yard passes. That’s it. Zorn’s playbook is half the size of one in Tecmo Bowl. He is a f**king God awful coach. And Greg Blache is a sh**ty ass defensive coordinator as well. Those two can ride out of town together.GMoney on his blog pretty much venting what everyone else stated except with more swearing.

Once upon a time the Redskins were a force to be reckoned with. Heck just two seasons ago they got into the playoffs, only to lose to the also-frustrating Seattle Seahawks.

Now they are the 2nd worst team in football (Browns will occupy that) and they may not sellout this weekend’s enticing affair with the mighty Tampa Bay Buccaneers.

I wouldn’t touch that game with a 10 foot pole. Go listen on a radio or find an internet stream instead of watching those guys in person. Saves money and decreases anger. Make Dan Snyder lose money by not going; at a minimum forget buying anything at the concession stand.

That was probably one of the most enjoyable posts I’ve ever “written”. Not to slight the Redskins, because I don’t hate them, but how people react after such a once-proud franchise simultaneously combust against the LIONS.

We will return to our regular format next week unless the Redskins lose 55-3 to Tampa, which is entirely feasible.


10 thoughts on “What the Losers Are Saying: Special Washington Redskins Edition

  1. JFein

    OT: As of now, the games I get this Sunday are

    Chiefs-Giants 1 on Fox
    Jets-Saints 4 on CBS
    Cowboys-Broncos 4 on Fox.

    For any changes in mine, my stations are
    CBS KYW Philadelphia
    CBS WYOU Scranton
    Fox WOLF Wilkes-Barre.

    The Fox game likely won’t change, but I could see one or both of my CBS affiliates switching out of the Jets and into Ravens-Pats.

    1. Mookie Post author

      I’ll fix everything some time on Thursday. Thanks for that.

      I’m getting Stockton/Davis again and then Myers/Billick in week 6. Didn’t I suffer enough?

      1. JFein

        NO! YOU MUST SUFFER MORE!!! ;-)

        Wow. I only had one week of Stockton/Davis and that was pure torture. I can’t imagine what 2 straight weeks of them will do? I fear that there is a chance that a part of you could die inside this Sunday……

        1. Mookie Post author

          The thought of losing 41-10 this weekend already has part of me dying.

          Just the sheer thought of Myers/Billick though.

    1. Mookie Post author

      Yeah I got bored with the old template and saw WordPress had some sparkling new stuff.

      Now you can quote comments in your replies.

      Glad you like it.


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