What the Losers Are Saying: Detroit Lions Edition

A post first written at Field Gulls.

A win is a win is a fire Bruce DeHaven. Seattle did not play poorly but they weren’t exactly fantastic. They did enough to win after another piss-poor start. But this segment doesn’t talk about winners. Whenever the Seahawks pull out a win, we take a scope at how the other half copes with defeat. This week’s victim is the Detroit Lions. They’re quite used to losing, but they blew a 17 point lead, and Lions fans are none too happy about that. If any Lions supporters are perusing this neck of the woods I just want to say that this is by no means meant to disrespect the fanbase. The point of WTLAS has always been to see what the defeated team thinks.

In-Game: Hass to HOUSH for a TD

“Trick play…Wallace is on the field as a wide out…gets the toss…of course, he’s going to throw…complete to Hoosmonshita at the Lions’ 17.  Why didn’t the Lions see this coming? WHY? Seattle wanted to try this a few plays earlier, but screwed the pooch! //facepalm//


Kill me now. Hasselbeck to Carlson…2 yard line.

I’m officially dead inside.

Hasselbeck to Hushmonxatta for the TD. F*CK!

Seattle have now scored 22 consecutive points before we see the PAT…which the Seahawks thankfully butcher.

What-the-f*ck-ever, the Seahawks now have the lead, 22-17.”

Big Al Beaton from the hilarious Wayne Fontes Experience, who live blogged the game.

Before you ask, that is his live-blogging style. Imagine if the Seahawks had blown them out. I’m liking Knapp’s trick plays so far but I think I would design a play with Seneca where he hands the ball off to the RB, who runs right, and throws it to the other side of the field to a (hopefully open) Wallace for a big gain and possibly a TD. I know the Chargers ran this with Drew Brees one time but Seneca has played receiver before.

In-Game: Josh Wilson Dashes Detroit’s Dreams of a Road Victory

“haha, fitting end

I give up on this team”

“stafford is f-cking pathetic.. someone try and stick up for him.. I dont care if he is a rookie– he plays like dog sh-t”

“Stafford is a perfect fit for the Lions organization”

Random in-game thread comments from MotownSports the moment Matt Stafford fired pick #5 in the air.

In-Game: More Reaction From Stafford’s Game-Ending Pick Plus Final Whistle

“God damnit i f*cking hate this stupid f*cking team so f*cking much. I hope they f*cking die on the way home”


“start the buses and wait patiently for your next beat down…”

“How can one person f*ck a team up so bad. How can one team be so bad?”

“A long day of work I run to the radio to hear, some radio guy say … well, the Lions scored the first 17 points… MY HEART FILLS WITH JOY … but lose to Seattle 32 to 20. I Scream in my car MOTHER PUSSBUCKET, as a women in the parking lot pauses and looks at me quite annoyed.”

“I take back what I said earlier I wish we would have drafted Curry. He can’t single handedly lose a game like that.”

The Pride of Detroit game thread was in uproar.

That second comment is pretty crude and uncalled for, but not everyone can be classy sophisticates like us FGers. I cannot believe Detroit ran play-action with so little time on 3rd down with no timeouts. The Lions are bad but there is no logic to that play AT ALL. Loved the interception by Wilson, who is coming along nicely in just 3 years as our “gambling DB”.

I think that MOTHER PUSSBUCKET remark is going to be a future sig. Sad but absolutely hilarious.

Post-Game Thoughts: Stafford Will Have Days Like This

“It’s going to happen with any NFL rookie. Hell, we’ve seen it from Brandon Pettigrew, who couldn’t catch a pass to save his life in Green Bay. From Louis Delmas several times this season, in taking some utterly stupid taunting calls. We’ve seen it from Derrick Williams in the exhibition season, after returning kicks all through college, he couldn’t catch a cold when attempting to return kicks for the Lions.

We need to remember they’re rookies. They are going to be better…next year.

So, no. It’s not worth getting all worked up, foam forming at the mouth, spittle flying, while cussing like the (occasionally) drunken Lions fan that I am.

I preached patience when I wrote about the cluster currently going on at the University of Michigan. I’d be a hypocrite if I didn’t practice what I preached when it comes to the Detroit Lions.

Thus, I’m giving Stafford a mulligan.

We all deserve a few, why not Stafford? Yes, he’s being paid a metric crap ton of cash to lead the Lions to the promised land…a .500 record. But he’s also a kid in his 1st NFL season. He’s not going to get “it” in his first season. Especially on a team with as many issues as the Lions.”

Revisiting Al from TWFE.

I tend to agree with Al here. He’s a rookie, and not everyone can be Matt Ryan. I’m just happy Stafford picked Sunday to channel his inner Ty Detmer. You can’t call any 1st round rookie a bust. Unless of course, you’re Aaron Curry, who definitely sucks. ONLY two forced fumbles? Fire Ruskell.

Post-Game: Special Teams Sucks (and other observations)

Has there ever been a bigger condemnation of a squad’s special teams unit that getting the ball kicked to them with 2 seconds left in a half and telling your return man to run directly out of bounds to avoid something bad happening? Oh Stan Kwan, start passing out those resumes!

The young defenders on this squad need to learn how to identify a screen pass. The Seahawks were smart and countered our constant over pursuit of plays with a steady dose of screens.

For all the positives with Scott Linehan’s playcalling and schemes, I can’t help but think that the game has passed Gunther Cunningham by. I know we don’t have a ton of talent on the defensive side of the ball but I just haven’t seen any blitzing of note this season and because of this, our weak secondary has been picked on relentlessly. We have linebackers like Sims and Peterson who have made a living blitzing QBs and they have rarely been allowed to do it.

Reverend Spielman from Church of Schwartz thinks Detroit’s special teams blows…and the defense too.

I recommend to everyone to go look up “Stan Kwan” under any Lions blog and you’ll get a similar reaction. Got a feeling our success in the kick return game had more to do with them sucking than Seattle’s competency in special teams. Think of Kwan as Bruce DeHaven but 1000 times worse.

That’s all there is this week. I wanted to post an angry Lions fan posting something on Youtube, but mysteriously not one of them has done a recap on this game. Oh well, this photo will do.


via dailyfacepalm.com



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